It's been a while.

Its been a while since I last posted. But don't think I haven't been trying. My first post "January 13 2010
I have decided to start blogging about my ups and so many downs of diets. I plan to at least write 3 times a week and "weigh" in once a week. My goal is to lose sixty five pounds by Jan 1 2011. Not only to lose, but to hopefully, become much more healthier than I am now. I know it's going to be a struggle. But I am willing to try just about everything. I will also be keeping a journal of everything I eat, daily.My current weight: 251 BMI: 45.9Goal weight by 1/1/11: 186. BMI: 34Earlier this year, I attempted to go through my insurance and get the Lap band system. However, I could not physically nor financially jump through the hoops to get them (Altius) to pay for it. So I am going to try to lose this weight the "old fashioned" way. With hard work, sweat, tears, and eating less, and way more healthy, I believe I can and will lose that sixty five pounds!"


Obviously this did not happen. And in fact gained a whole bunch more, I believe my heaviest weight was around 270+ ish.. Somethings have changed since my last post July of 2011. I joined Weight Watchers at the end of Aug 2011, weighing in at 266. I absolutely love Weight Watchers, and what it has done for my life. I have lost a total of 22.4 lbs so far.Starting weight at WW is 266.8.. And I am proud to say, I didn't gain anything through the holidays! First time ever!! I have been trying to be active more. "Move More" and this has helped some. But more than anything it's what I've been eating, and the portion size. I now get fuller with less, and am making better food choices.

I have the support of my wonderful husband, and we have been moving more, together. We took a water aerobics class together last week, and it was so much fun. Today I did go again, this time, however, alone. Still alott of fun. I am enjoying losing the weight, and feeling/seeing the difference in my clothes.

Scott hasn't really "noticed" a difference in how I look.. I can, and many others can. But I think it's just because he sees me every day, and he's pretty much not aware of weight, or lack their of. He thinks I am the same size as some 300 + lbs person, and he is just not very observative.

Anyways, I have been having a great time going to meetings, and getting to know different people. By now, my meeting leader knows me by name. I go every Monday to weigh in. And I am loving it.
I am learning not to eat food because I am sad, or hurt. I am eating now, because I am hungry.. It's a very conscious choice, where as before. It was not.

1/25/2010

Today I just went out for a walk, for about an hour. I took both my dogs, and Scott came too! It was a nice enjoyable walk, and at times I jogged a bit. I am also going to start taking Alli, it's the only medicine my doctor will advise me of having because of possible side effects of the other medications that are prescription. I already have a low-fat/fat-free diet, now I just really need to work on portion control. It's hard though when I feel so hungry, and I eat so fast that I eat more to feel full, I should eat a small amount, and wait 20 or so minutes before dishing up more. But that is a big struggle for me, I think I have a fear of being hungry.. It's not a fun thing, I don't know why I must fear this, why with all the food and convenience in the world today..
I just weighed in and I lost 2.2 lbs.... When getting ready to go on this walk, ya know, it's a work out just on its own.. I have to get my sports bra on, work out pants that should fit only two sizes ago, and a very tight shirt, with cap sleeves that feel like tourniquets.. Putting on compression socks, and tying on tennis shoes.. I was already sweating. And when I was done, I didn't even feel like going. Because it's such a work out for me just doing the most mundane of tasks. For a while I had Scott tie my shoes every morning. Do you know how that feels. I am 23! I should be able to reach, and tie my own shoes just fine!!! THAT'S WHY I NEED TO DO THIS! FOR ME!!

And please, wish me luck tonight, I am going out to a pizzeria for my brothers birthday party.. And I just hope, I don't eat too much pizza. I better get a salad, so I don't over eat. But even salads, these days, you can't trust them. Especially in restaurants!!!! EVIL places of delicious foods and devilish deserts..

1/19/2010

I know it has been some time since my last post. I have been very busy, getting new carpet and painting. And that really is just the half of it. I haven't been focused nor had time to exercise. But that also means I haven't been focused on eating. And with a buried kitchen, food was even hard to get to.. With that being said, I weighed yesterday. And I have lost 3 lbs. since my last entry, so that is great. I am awfully stressed, with trying to get the house ready to sell. I hope it sells fast. The only time I get to myself is a 10 min shower, and today, while I was in there. I was thinking. When I was young, and starting to eat more and more. I remember looking up to my older siblings and wanting to eat just like them. I even remember feeling accomplished with eating 3, yes THREE packages of Ramon. I really thought I did a good job. And with your parents making "you" clean your plate. It's no wonder why half of America is over weight. I grew up in the age of Nintendo.. I didn't have many friends. My family wasn't active in the Mormon church, so every one in our neighborhood looked down upon me, and my family. My time was spent playing Nintendo, and watching movies. And allot of TV. And eating.. Allot allot of eating. We eat to celebrate, eat to morn.. I even eat out of boredom. I need a life style change. ... food for thought..

January 13 2010

I have decided to start blogging about my ups and so many downs of diets. I plan to at least write 3 times a week and "weigh" in once a week. My goal is to lose sixty five pounds by Jan 1 2011. Not only to lose, but to hopefully, become much more healthier than I am now. I know it's going to be a struggle. But I am willing to try just about everything. I will also be keeping a journal of everything I eat, daily.


My current weight: 251 BMI: 45.9
Goal weight by 1/1/11: 186. BMI: 34

Earlier this year, I attempted to go through my insurance and get the Lap band system. However, I could not physically nor financially jump through the hoops to get them (Altius) to pay for it. So I am going to try to lose this weight the "old fashioned" way. With hard work, sweat, tears, and eating less, and way more healthy, I believe I can and will lose that sixty five pounds!